Can Someone Please Edit My Essay?
I am applying to the Master’s in Social Work program because I want to help others maximize their potential and steer their lives in a positive direction. I am concerned with the needs of everyone in my community and I am passionate about helping our most vulnerable individuals; specifically our troubled and neglected youth. I want to become a social worker so I can empower these individuals to help them overcome their problems and change their lives for the better.
I am a thirty-four year old woman who has overcome a period of homelessness in my life. When I was homeless, having an advocate and mentor helped me connect with employment services. But first I needed someone to meet me where I was and treat me with dignity.
I had a mentor that taught and guided me in my life. The impact that she had on my life inspired me to want to help others. I want to use the knowledge and understanding I have gained to assist people in changing their lives. I believe education is the key to being able to do that. Specifically, a Master’s degree in Social Work would put me in the greatest position for achieving my goal. A social worker on Skid Row in Los Angeles started me on the path toward healing my own life. She provided me with constant support and a sense of hope. Six months later, I found a job as a youth counselor at Harbor View Adolescent Center, a residential treatment center, working with adolescents who had behavioral and emotional problems. I believe that Social Work is the professional track that is the best match for my being able to make a positive difference in the lives of adolescents.
In my job as a youth counselor, my primary work responsibility was to serve as a positive role model for adolescents aged twelve to eighteen. The residents had encountered issues such as homelessness, drug and alcohol abuse, and criminal justice system. At times, my job was extremely stressful. But I discovered that I had the ability to connect with the adolescents and develop strong emotional ties with them. I focused on helping them with their social skills, coping skills, and independent living skills. My main goal was to help them build their self-esteem and improve their sense of security.
The adolescents that I worked with could become physically assault and self-harming themselves at times. It was during these critical situations that I would experience problems in knowing what the best clinical approach to use when a child is self-harming. I would like to have better tools in order to help these kids when they are in crisis, and whether those interventions are well supported by literature. I hope that with the aid of a Master’s degree in Social Work, I can achieve that. I want to be able to help the adolescents in their time of crisis and teach them the necessary skills they will need to transition into a more independent way of living. These youth need all the attention we can give them in order to prevent recidivism, especially African American and Hispanic males, who tend to continually come back into the system. If you were to grant me the privilege of studying in your program, I would like to research the recidivism rates of African American and Hispanic juveniles and young adults. I hope to contribute our understanding of how we can best go about saving the lives and, at the same time, ease the financial burdens on our society.
The guiding principle of my life is that I want to help serve others that are vulnerable and less fortunate individuals of our communities and offer any aid that we can. I have always lived by the motto “do unto others as you would have done to you”, and feel that the best way to do this is by furthering the ideal of social justice in the way I live and work. Social justice, as I see it, is the value system that recognizes the inherent worth and dignity of every human being and the right of everyone to be treated fairly and with respect. I believe that every individual is worthy of dignity and respect and each individual has the ability to become self-sufficient and able to make the best possible decisions for themselves. When we as a society try to see the world through the eyes of the less fortunate, we can empathize with and understand one another instead of focusing on our differences. Only when each and every individual of a community is afforded the same level of dignity and respect can a society truly be called civilized. Those who cannot demand social justice for themselves must have a voice to demand it for them. It is my hope that by earning a Master‘s degree in Social Work I can be that voice.
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One sentence needs some grammaticall help: " I hope to contribute our understanding of how we can best go about saving the lives and, at the same time, ease the financial burdens on our society." Just add "to" after contribute and I think you mean saving their lives not the lives…or perhaps say, improving the quality of life for these citizens.
You surely do sound like a social worker! I work with many Master level social workers and you got the language down pat. I would suggest that your essay would be stronger if you enhance the part about how at the same social work services ease the financial burden on our society, because that is a battle that as a social worker you will fight so often you will do in your sleep.
while it iis true that social justice means all are valued, there are too many people in power who don’t care if some people are stepped on, and sadly, those in power often hold the purse strings.
GOOD LUCK to you and good job over coming adversity!